Monday, 28 December 2009

I'm a disgrace to the internet.

Look, if you'd wanted it finished in time you shouldn't have said such insanely nice things about the first two bits, now should you? How am I supposed to work with those sort of expectations? Gits.
Not really! Thanks to everyone who did say insanely nice things about Countdown to the End of Time and sorry it turned out to be about as punctual as when Invisibles counted down to the millenium.
All's not lost though. Even though I'll have to drop the "reviewing an episode without having seen it" angle now that we've seen it, I still think the material that makes up the remainder of the project will be interesting enough as a discussion of its context. I'll just call it End of Time Aftermath: Eat or something.

So, yeah. Three essay-oids left, provisionally entitled...

Merry Magha Puja, Mister Potter.

The Sheriff of Nottingham's Daughter and

Killing in the Name of Gummo.

Coming Soonish.


  1. I've read parts one and two, as well as the canon essay, about three times apiece over the last month.

    So no pressure, then.

  2. So you *don't* have to revise the whole thing to examine James Bond-lore as well?

  3. To be fair, I didn't say anything nice about the last two. I really enjoyed them, but I was very withholding of my praise, so none of this blame can be placed on my shoulders.

    Everyone else, however, it makes total sense to blame. I'll forgive them, though, as I eagerly await the next bits.

  4. Who knew that compliments would nuke the blog.

    If I promise never to say anything nice ever again will you come back?

  5. I did see your theories poking through in The End of Time, actually... The last year of specials are about the Doctor's inability to escape death. There's some force that just won't let him.

    That force isn't destiny and it isn't fate, it's Russell T Davies. It's basically a story about a fictional character's reaction when his author decides to kill him off.

    Or maybe I've gone mental.

  6. Hey there Teatime, this kind of has nothing to do with the post but I just read Tim Callaghan’s blog alluding to Who / Morrison similarities where I mentioned how similar The End Of Time is to Final Crisis. And in light of reading your post of a year ago re. The Stolen Earth / Journey’s End’s similarities to Final Crisis, I recently pondered all this to an unholy level and as a fellow Who / Morrison fan thought you might be interested if I rather boringly repeat what I said on Tim’s blog, where I laid out some - if not most - of the comparison points I’ve spotted between the End Of Time and Final Crisis. I’m sure most of these are in other RTD episodes also, but we’ll stick with The End Of Time for now.

    Quite frankly, these outrank the Matrix / Invisibles debate for any possible future plagiarism accusations from Mr. Morrison… This is a bit long (in two bits) but here we go.

    As in Final Crisis, it marks a dark, apocalyptic 'final' story by the writer where all of reality and creation - and by dint, all of series ‘canon’ going back forty-odd years - are threatened with extinction and eradication by insane, corrupt dying gods who have fallen through time - having been previously forced out of heaven in a great war that ended a previous golden age - and returned to the present, where they declare all of life and human thought is futile and must be ended so they can ascend to a higher - or arguably lower - plane of existence.

    As in Final Crisis, the conclusion sees a respected, pacifist crimefighter who never uses a gun, beaten and broken down - having recently gone through something of a schizoid break where he lost sight of his friends and become dangerously driven and unhinged - pointing a gun at a resurrected, despotic, quasi-Hitlerian god-figure he is familiar with from his own self-contradicting and canonically questionable past.

    As in Final Crisis, this central protagonist - who is also a long-lived cultural icon recognized by many millions who may never have even partaken of the original source material - and a fictional character who is also part of many shared creative universes - is tragically killed and then later shown to still be paradoxically alive in a different timeframe - revealing that, as an iconic fictional creation, he will always survive death in all its forms, because he is essentially immortal.

    As in Final Crisis, one of the characters is visited by an unnamed and never-identified godlike figure (a character I identified as the show’s writer, entering the fictive narrative in a Morrisonian fictionsuit, but maybe that’s going a bit too far) who speaks in metaphysical riddles and presents the character with a nondescript ‘weapon’ that is a key element in the predicted defeat of the evil gods and their plan to wipe out humanity.

    As in Final Crisis, a ragtag band of survivor heroes escape to an orbital satellite to evade the evil, pseudo-Satanic brainwashing signal of the hero’s crazed nemesis, who has transformed every person on earth into his own exact mirror image in an attempt to forestall his own judgement at the hands of his former god-allies he believes dead. (Although this visual trick of replicating the evil character in everyone else, however, is blatantly and clearly stolen from the Matrix Revolutions, an irony Morrison may well have found hilarious).

    (more below)

  7. (cont...)

    As in Final Crisis, one of the characters caught up in events and taken to the station largely against his own will, gazes out of the station window at the planet below, and amazed, declares that he never thought he’d see Earth from outer space.

    As in Final Crisis, there is a narration by a godlike, monitoring character who tells the story of how this was the day when the world ended.

    As in Final Crisis, there are at least two clear points where the decimated, ruined human race is ‘restored’ to a previous state, in a universal ‘hard-drive restore’-style reset button event.

    Like in Final Crisis, there’s a literal deus ex machina, an ultimate maguffin machine which can heal the populations of entire worlds.

    Like in Final Crisis, a pivotal character is killed by radiation poisoning. (Ok that one’s a bit spurious, but hey…)

    As in Final Crisis, there’s an extremely compressed attempt on the part of the creator to tell an epic, end-of-the-world saga, which is overblown, confused, confusing, contradictory and full of unresolved loose ends, illogical technobabble, unnecessary character cameos, and essentially is just another generic sci-fi story about stories, where an all-powerful evil force threatens to destroy all of reality, and the hero defeats them at the end with seeming great ease.

    As in Final Crisis, it marks the supposed final written contribution and ‘last word’ on the shared universe the writer has been thoroughly involved in writing key portions of for the past five or so years, culminating in the writer going on to state they don’t intend to revisit these characters or franchises ever again. Except they probably will cos they’re inveterate liars.

    As in Final Crisis, a huge amount of the writer’s previously hardcore fans absolutely detested it, and poured their incandescent scorn onto internet forums, declaring they would never partake of the writer’s respective chosen creative medium again.

    And for a final comparison between Season Five of Doctor Who and Morrison’s Batman & Robin (neither of which I have seen / read yet, but anyway) they both sees a central iconic character appear to die, and be replaced in his role by a younger, newer and more optimistic character, with a newer, significantly younger sidekick to assist him in his neverending battles against evil and injustice. As is what happens with life, I suppose.

    Also, you did you pick up on any of those rumours that Morrison was set to write an episode of season five? I’m not sure where I read this, but I have the odd suspicion I may only really be basing this on Morrison announcing he was writing an episode of a TV show in some interview, and my unfounded suspicions that RTD is a secret massive Mozza fan… though sadly, the writers have now been announced, and he’s not, at least not yet, and neither is the also-rumoured Neil Gaiman…

    My basic first thoughts upon watching the first few episodes of season one of Nu-Who were essentially, ‘This is what Doctor Who would be like if Grant Morrison was writing it!’

    ie, good versus evil, on a big, mad, cosmic scale, but with emotional investment and solid, ‘real-world’ character grounding.

    Oh and Morrison really needs to put a Shilo Norman / Batman team-up in ‘The Return Of Bruce Wayne.’ That would so totally rule.

  8. Thought you might be interested in this It's a link to PEP! a magazine put together by fellow blogger and Dr Who fan Andrew Hickey, and includes within its pages perhaps the ultimate antidote to your canon rant. Bloody brilliant.

  9. You know, it's not too late to write these. :)

  10. I'm afraid it may be. At least so long as the author remains completely missing with no contact button.

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